Dating is making people get angry when they don’t get something that they really want.
If you have been on date after date, trying to find someone who sticks, you can reach a point where you start getting angry – but you need to stop. Getting angry may make sense but it doesn’t work. It makes sense in the same way that you’d be irritated if you had sent out resumes without ever getting an interview – going on lots of dates without finding a lasting relationship can cause the nicest and happiest of men and women to become a little bitter, angry and frustrated.
When you start to get angry, you might start to not believe a word anyone says in their profile for fear that it’s just all lies and you may act sarcastic or get defensive on dates due to past experiences. Furthermore, you may ask questions or make comments as if you’re testing the other person and you may secretly fear that everyone you go on a date with is already being intimate with several other people. The problem with this is that you will just be alienating yourself and pushing good people away.
You need to be honest that you’ve become bitter about the whole dating process, and create a plan to improve your mood about dating so that you attract good and sane people into your life. The key here is to not get angry but get better.
Ask yourself what kind of relationship you want. Be clear about whether you want to casually date or whether you’re ready to set up house soon if you meet the right person. Be honest but not a sucker, and don’t lose sight of the bigger picture. Go back to the drawing board and write down the five to ten traits you’re looking for in a partner, and ask yourself if you have been on dates in the past several months with anyone who meets these criteria. If you have been on dates with people who meet all or some of the criteria then ask yourself what went wrong. Was it them or was it you? Ask yourself how you can make yourself better to be more competitive in the dating scene.
Sometimes it is best to work on yourself first before trying to date again. Maybe even try a new social scene because when you get bitter in dating, it’s time to change your literal point of view. If you continue to go to the same places week after week, there’s a good chance that you’ll either become bored or bitter because you’re not varying your social routine enough and you are not working on yourself enough.
Work out, eat well, work on your wardrobe, work on your mental outlook and stay focused on your goals.
Sooner or later, we all hit a point where our emotional gas tank is running low and we will start to get angry. But we should remember to not get angry and transmute all of that emotional energy into something else – GETTING BETTER!
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