The girlfriend versus dating conundrum.
Find out what you want, either dating or a relationship. Find out what you want from women and what you like or don’t like. No-one can tell you what you will like or not like because that is very personal and subjective.

You are developing an identity by knowing what you want out of life. Once you have that identity and you are thriving for what you want in life then you will know what you want from dating and what you want from a partner.

Everything in life has to have a purpose. A girlfriend needs to have a purpose, even in your own life. Having a girlfriend isn’t about sex if you are a man that can get intercourse often. Having a girlfriend is about making your life better with someone that compliments you.

If sex is the most important think for you then you can’t have real realizations about a relationship. What I mean by this is that some guys want a girlfriend because he only wants to have sex. If you only want sex then just get sex. Get into a relationship because you want a relationship (and not sex).

Don’t get a girlfriend based off of emotions but because she adds value to your life. Emotions fade but value can be for a lifetime. If you match with a woman and she helps you in life from anything simple such as cooking for you, or helping you clean or even helping you with your business then that is a woman of value and a woman that respects you and sees you as a high value man.

Some women, the only thing they have is the sexual attraction. It is equivalent to the hot Instagram chick that is only hot, she isn’t interesting, she doesn’t have any high value skill and she isn’t knowledgeable – all she has is her beauty. That is why prostitution is the oldest and the only profession that can survive anything – a pandemic, a world war, an extinction level event etc.

One man will go out to dinner with a girl and buy her an $80 steak with wine and watch her eat it while he drinks water and nothing else – that is basic simping. While another man goes out to dinner with a woman and she pays for both their meals because she is on Onlyfans and her Onlyfans account is a team effort – they are both living off of the profits – that is a woman and a man knowing value in their relationship.

Dating is about everything. The way you talk, the choices you make, and everything you say. It is also about how you resolve situations; this is all a trickle-down effect coming from a certain mentality.

The reality is a lot of chicks want a man but don’t want to be a girlfriend. In cuffing season, she talks about “thanksgiving with bae” and “Christmas with bae” then in the spring and summertime she is off at a yacht party with strange men surrounding her. Thus, you have to allow enough time for the mask to come off on a woman that is not valuable.

Thus, men need to filter chicks rather than chase them. Remember, attention is currency and male attention will inflate a girl’s head to the point where she treats you like a number and a fan because she feels like a celebrity.

Sexual attraction versus relationship attraction.
Whether you want to admit it or not – there is a difference between sexual attractiveness and relationship attractiveness. The best thing to happen to you is if a woman or man sees you as both sexual and relationship material.

A lot of men are seen as relationship material because they are stable or they have resources. Most of these men feel they are wanted on a romantic level because women want to be in a relationship with them but that is far from the case. A woman might seek out a relationship but that does not necessarily mean she sees her partner as being sexual compatible and enticing to her.

A woman can want you for dating and marriage yet want to have sex with other men she finds sexually appealing. Get it in your head that there is a stark contrast between being wanted for sex and being wanted for a relationship.

All in all, if a woman is sexually attracted to you then she will want you for sex even though she may or may not see you as relationship material. If she does see you as relationship material while there is sexual chemistry then you have hit the jackpot and are one of the few amounts of men on the planet that understand this dynamic and have placed yourself in a situation where a woman sees you as having the ability to fulfil both aspects in her life.

The game changes.
Dating will always change as new technologies take center stage in our lives as well as the change of mindset in each new generation. Dating will shift but the way to date effectively will stay the same.

The point I am making is that dating has changed from your parents choosing who you will marry to picking up women in the church to picking them up at the bars, to using dating websites or chat lines such as Lava Life to now dating apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge. Some aspects of dating have changed while the fundamentals have basically remained the same.

A woman should work and earn the commitment of a relationship – so should men. A man has options yet if he enters a relationship then he is choosing that woman to date and even settle down with. Thus, have a woman be with you in a relationship through merit, that way she will respect you. And that is part of the foundation to a strong relationship.

Preparation and stopping the comparisons.
A wise man once said, “preparation is half the battle” and his words have never been wrong. I am preparing you to understand dating and relationships. I am preparing you to understand when subterfuge is happening so instead of saying, “WTF” – you don’t even flinch because you understand why she is acting that way and you get out and find a better woman to be with.

Comparing yourself to other men in many cases is a way of looking down on yourself. Only compare yourself to the guy you were yesterday. Constant comparisons with other men will put you in a negative mindset when you feel other men are doing way better than you. There will always be a guy in the world doing better than you so the best thing to do is be a better version of yourself every day, week and month.

Furthermore, men need to acclimate to the situation since women have a cutthroat mentality when it comes to dating but just don’t talk about it. They will flake on you, because they feel they have options. They will leave you on read, they will insult you and they will try and find someone better; so why not do the same?