Any worthy dating prospect will tell you there’s nothing sexier than a man who can hold his own in conversation and respond with quick wit in unexpected ways. It communicates a sense of confidence and a willingness to be unguarded. Most of all, it gives you presence and an air of intelligence.
HERE ARE SOME WAYS TO BE WITTY AND SEXY:
1. Be quick with your replies:
The funnier your reply the better. Wittiness by definition has to do with being quick and clever. Plus, timing is everything. When it comes to wit the time you spend processing your thoughts may be a missed opportunity. So, say whatever comes to your mind. We often self-monitor and are careful about the things that come out of our mouths and while there are certain contexts where it isn’t appropriate to let just any old thing roll from your tongue; use your judgment. Practice letting your guard down a little. Forget the self-monitoring and say whatever unpolished thing comes to your mind. Wit is about delivering the unexpected. But don’t be weird, don’t say things such as “I want to do xxx to you” and don’t say “That outfit is hot on you” if you haven’t build up a rapport with said female.
2. Don’t be invested in the outcome:
Let your goal be to just be yourself. Don’t aim to be funny, just be funny since most people that are funny don’t aim to be. In fact, they may even seem nonchalant about whatever it is they’re saying because wit doesn’t try hard. Wit is best when it is like a tennis ball hit from one side of the court to the other. Granted, there are some people unskilled at being quick in thought and confident enough to return the quip, but if you can find “in’s” in the conversation to tease a little, this may open the door for the other to be engaged and comfortable enough to go back and forth with you a little. So engage in banter. People love to feel like you’re paying attention to them and building on the things they say. Adding in a bit of humor will go a long way and make them be comfortable enough for you to ESCALATE.
3. Intelligence is sexy:
Let’s face it. Witty people are also most likely intelligent people. They use metaphors and other antics that help in their delivery, but in order to use metaphors you have to be an observer of life and know how to make connections to seemingly unconnected concepts. Polish your wit with a little knowledge of popular culture, words of a song or a good book.
4. Keep your ears open:
Keep a keen ear open for opportunities to weave in earlier jokes. Think about your favorite stand up routine. The trick of the trade is being able to tell a story while using a common thread that unites all of what you’re saying.The popularity of the phrase, “That’s what she said,” from television’s The Office, was not only funny because it most often came at unawares, but also because it built on earlier jokes making laughter roll that much easier.
5. End on a high note:
There’s nothing less sexy than someone who’s trying to be funny, but just doesn’t know when to end. You laugh the first time, the second, maybe even the third, but ALRIGHT, ENOUGH, it’s not funny anymore! Please don’t be that guy! Allow enough space in time between uses of earlier jokes. Be like a comedian. Hypothetically drop the mic and end the show while everyone’s still laughing. Sexy has less to do with what you wear and more to do with your energy. Be confident, witty and sexy.
After digesting and reading through my five points above. Some guys will scratch there heads and go, “Well, I am not quick with replies and I do not know how to be witty. How is this going to work for me?”
This is where social intelligence and social experience comes in. You can try and be quick with your replies until you are quick. You can try and be witty until you are witty. You can try and end things on a high note until you get it right. You can try and be intelligent in conversations until you are. All of these are skills that you can work on until they are perfected and your social experience and intelligence is high. As they say, “practice makes perfect” and this is no different.
You can’t sit on a coach and nag about your life. Take action and change it – go out there and get better each and everyday. It might be hard at first for those with not much social skills but with practice it gets better and better.
THE BEST CONVERSATION STRATEGY:
The best dating strategy is the one that will guarantee you more confidence, more dates, more conversations and more success. It is a strategy that is simple and always works. Over-all, the best strategy to meet and date a potential partner is to interact with them like this: Walk up to any woman, say hello and introduce yourself and then proceed to talk to her like a normal person.
It is crazy how you can talk to women like they are normal people no matter how attractive they are and find yourself in super interesting conversations.
This strategy is criminally effective, yet extremely underutilized. It’s crazy how the simple strategy of just being yourself can accomplish amazing conversations that become amazing dates and turn in remarkable relationships.
Just rely on yourself and your personality to open, carry and end a conversation well – talk about stuff that you want to talk about, instead thinking that you HAVE to say something “cool” or “witty” to engage with any woman and impress her.
Now some of you may think I am contradicting myself here BUT I am not. THINKING you HAVE to say something cool or witty is parallel to not having anything cool or witty to say in the first place. Being cool and witty and intelligent should be NATURAL and not made up or forced. Any woman can tell a forced conversation or rehearsed joke or line. It is distasteful. If you aren’t natural then most women can spot it a mile away. The best thing to do as I have said before is to garner social awareness and intelligence. It is a skill that you build upon through grit and merit and experience. Once you have this skill then everything is natural and flows properly.
Social skills and social intelligence are of the utmost importance when trying to have a discussion with anyone. Once you have this solved then all you do is introduce yourself and then just talk to her like she’s a normal human being. But your social skills make it more than a discussion, it is a seduction.
A discussion is the equivalent of seducing someone to the argument you are presenting. Every interaction between a person with another or a group of people is a seduction. You are wooing people over by your eloquent and seductive thoughts. You are using words to illicit a reaction from them. You use your words to seduce them not always in a sexual manner but a seduction none-the-less. Many people are aware of this while most others haven’t even thought of the fact. The real seducers are conscious about all the interpersonal interactions they are involved in and know the importance of every interpersonal communication as a potential seduction. An unconscious person who is not aware will take life as it comes, without actively participating in it. Seducers, on the other hand, see the world from a different perspective.
Many women can be turned off in a few seconds after they start talking to an attractive guy by the way he talks or what comes out of his mouth. You need to be able to carry an intelligent and/or witty conversation and once again, this comes through having social intelligence of how to present and start such a conversation as well as who to start a conversation with – even why you are starting said conversation.
Yes, it can be very intimidating. I know this for a fact because I was once in your position. I was 120 pounds soaking wet at one point in my life. A bit awkward, did not have the right social skills and women had the ability to run circles around me. BUT, then I began to become better and better at dating and through time I had the right social skills and social intelligence to know how to interact effectively in public. I decided to hit the gym, eat right, take my vitamins and know how to date properly. Now I am 200 pounds, fit, dress well and exude energy. When I started out, one strategy I adopted was to just imagine that she’s your best friend. This usually took the pressure off and allowed me to make friendly conversation with any woman that would entertain me.
Just talking to a woman like a normal person is great and all but unfortunately, even with this strategy, some women simply will not talk to you. That’s because no matter who you are, no matter what you do, and no matter what you have going on in your life – some people are just not going to like you! Accept that as a part of life, and move on to someone who will have a conversation with you, who will like having conversation with you and who will like dating and being in a relationship with you.
Just remember, the more you normalize women, the more confident you’ll become. The more you don’t pedestalize them, the more attractive you become. Women are attracted to men who tell it like it is and aren’t afraid to stand up for themselves – these men are in their masculine frame. The moment you like a woman, you act needy and you put her on a pedestal then you are at her mercy and not in your frame. And you will fall right into the category of men she finds unattractive and a SIMP.