THE MASCULINE FRAME:
Having a masculine frame helps you project a powerful masculine aura. Developing a masculine frame is how a man creates a powerful aura. The masculine frame is about the way you carry yourself. A man with a masculine frame is a man that is balanced both in mentality, spirituality and physicality. This is a man that is confident without having a domineering behaviour, he is stoic without heartless insensitivity, he is ambitious without having unbridled avarice and is competitive without showing sociopathic aggression.
Most modern-day men lack this masculine frame due to vary societal reasons. One of these reasons include the lack of strong male role models for young men to look up to and model themselves after as well as the lack of fathers in many homes.
The need for male role models:
A manly figure in a home makes a big difference in a young man’s life – especially to keep that young man on the straight and narrow, allowing him to become successful in life. A manly figure will allow a man to know how to handle stressful situations, dangerous situations and even sexual situations. A role model with teach him how to maintain himself as well as how to hold frame as well as teach him how to handle confrontations and challenges. Even an uncle, or cousin in a boy’s life makes a surprisingly big difference on that boys life outcome.
Without a strong male role model, a boy will grow up and learn how to be a man from a woman or even a beta male. He will be at a huge disadvantage when compared to men that have strong fathers. The boy that lives in a household with just a mother will pick up the traits that she possesses.
The fact is, without any kind of strong male influence, a child has little chance of developing a masculine frame as he ages.
I will admit though, there are some men who “grow from concrete” as you would put it. These men are outliers that pick up on social cues, and are fast learners. They can easily adapt to their environment and thrive. But even then, there’s usually an uncle, a cousin, a brother, or even a TV character that they model themselves after.
WHY KEEP A MASCULINE FRAME?
Be a man that has a masculine frame – this is a man that is seen as strong, powerful and has the ability to handle his emotions. This is a man that is cool, calm and collected – stoic, sincere, fair and ambitious. This is a man where women can sense his presence and respond favourably to his aura. Other men will respect or hate this or sometimes both. This is a man that younger men look up to and admire.
You do not want to be a man that is without frame or any control over his life. A man without frame is a man that is passive or passive-aggressive and is never living his life to his truest potential. This ultimately leads to men transmuting their masculine energy into negativity that will ultimately lead to their downfall.
HOW TO DEVELOP A MASCULINE FRAME:
There is a trait that every man needs to master, in order to call himself a man. A trait so important that not having it can cause low self-esteem, doubt, lack of confidence, or even the lack of that feeling of being a man which men get when we are in our full masculine potential. This trait, or rather a skill which can, though through great difficulty, be learned, is how to control your frame.
SKILL 1: The first thing to help you develop a masculine frame is to learn how to interact with people:
You improve your social skills by practicing them. Go out, talk to people, engage with them and your social skills will improve.
Here are 6 social skills that are important:
- active listening
- conflict resolution
- effective communication
- relationship management
The two that can be picked up quickly would be respect and effective communication. This might not be the case for everyone since we all have our strengths and weaknesses.
Respect is important because we all need to know when to initiate communication effectively and respond appropriately. Allowing others to speak without interruption is seen as a necessary communication skill tied to respectfulness. Respectful communication also means using your time wisely – this can be done by asking clear questions as well as responding fully to any questioned posed to you. This is easy to pick up since all you have to do is not talk over people, not speak when they are speaking and answering all questions people ask you.
Effective communication is the ability to communicate well with others. This is a very important social skills since communication is a cornerstone of understanding. If you have strong communication skills, you’ll be able to share your thoughts and ideas clearly with others. Effective communicators make good leaders because they can easily explain projects and goals in an easy-to-understand way. This can be learnt quickly by being open and honest with people – and people will appreciate this.
Even now, my social skills are improving because of two things, social skills are never perfected but practiced and the social atmosphere is constantly changing.
It is always good to know which social skills you are okay at, which ones you are good at and which ones you are very bad at.
Once you have an understanding of your strengths and weaknesses then you will know what to work on and in which situations you are comfortable.
For example, some people are more comfortable in one-on-one conversations while others are comfortable in group discussions.
The idea here is that you need to practice someone, you can start slow or dive in. But you still need practice: try going out with friends, your brothers or sisters, or just talking to random people or even your neighbors.
If you have poor social skills because you are shy or introverted then:
- Keep practicing your social skills in a comfortable manner
If you have poor social skills because of your behavior or habits then improve your skills by avoid doing these:
Passive-Aggressiveness and Sarcasm
Real solutions to problems cannot be had if a person is constantly belittling others in a passive-aggressive manner or with sarcasm. Sarcasm or passive-aggression is often seen as a personal attack and can escalate quickly into something really ugly. Try to be honest and earnest as an alternative approach to find a solution that works best.
One of the biggest signs of poor communication is getting angry at or belittling people instead of making a problem the focus of your communication. This can be seen if a person calls someone stupid or an idiot if they present a plan that may need a little bit more work or calling people lazy because they are behind on projects or assignments.
Disregarding or Invalidating Feelings
Whenever someone communicates with you it’s important to validate their feelings, even if you disagree with them. This is a very important communication skill since it shows you have an understanding of their emotions and can make them more receptive to constructive criticism.
Another way to poorly communicate is always having a one way communication. This can be because the person is talking to much and not allowing space or time for others to ask questions or give comments or ideas. Remember, communication is never a one way street.
Another sign of poor communication skills is being the guy or girl with nothing but negative things to say to anyone or about anything. This would be the man or woman at work that shit talks people, shoots down other people’s ideas and is constantly pessimistic.
You directives are very common in the workplace. They typically begin with You and forms a negative statement or retort. Such as, “You are late.” “You should have gotten this done yesterday.” “You were not supposed to have done this.” “You will finish this today” etc etc etc. These directives make people defensive since they are being communicated at than communicated to and can make way for a negative situation whenever they are done as well as a toxic work environment.
SKILL 2: Next, learn how to control your emotions:
I have said this many many times – your emotions can get you into serious trouble if you do not keep them in check.
Whatever decisions and actions you take each day shape and mold your life and your future.
Many times, all the negative impact you have on your life, your family, your friends and your work colleagues are the result of an imbalanced thinking and the follow through of angry thoughts and feelings into actions.
Imbalanced or asymmetric thinking:
We all need to enhance our thinking process and we can all do this with simply a little bit of exercise. With activities such as a brisk walk, running, jogging, cardio at the gym, swimming, push-ups or even lifting a few weights; we get more blood flow to the brain and thus can think better, come up with better ideas and make better decisions.
Controlling emotions and actions:
When we get angry emotions that lead to angry actions, we need to stop and transmute all those emotions into something else such as vigorous exercise or an activity we really enjoy to get our minds and our thoughts processing as we begin to get calmer. For example, if someone made you angry and you want to get on the phone and “rip them a new one” then maybe try and not dial their number, act as if you are on the phone with them and get all those thoughts and feelings out. THEN, go for a jog or a walk, listen to some heavy metal music or just lift weights; think about the consequences your actions could have caused not only you but your family as well. The negative effects of those actions such as job loss, inability to pay bills, and the embarrassment of such a split decision action. Once this is done then maybe get your thoughts and feelings organized and coherent and speak to the person or persons you were angry with earlier. You may even wait a day or two to really process your emotions and then speak to them not with anger but with facts on the issue.
GREAT LEADERS never let their emotions show:
They stay focused and on course. They look at facts and figures and keep angry emotions away from the workplace. This does not mean they do not get angry, or flustered. This just means they contain themselves in the workplace and release or transmute those emotions elsewhere. They take actions and even the blame when things go wrong, they contain the problem and solve the problem as quickly as possible. They analyze the facts and make clear decisions and actions when needed. Thus, it is far more important to have an unbiased, calm, methodical, and clear thinking than to operate with anger at the work place.
Over the long term, you will realize that you will stop getting angry, build patience, have better thoughts and take better actions.
SKILL 3: Next, learn how to transmute your energy:
Things won’t always go your way. You can hit on a girl and she rejects you or you can have a girlfriend, be the perfect guy for her and she still cheats. Life is life and how we handle the issues in our lives really shapes and molds us.
Anything can happen in life and all these things can be out of your control. What can be in your control though is how you handle these matters.
Transmute all your energy into willpower – this includes all your sexual energy since expressing this energy through sex and desire dissipates its power. Sexual energy goes in one of two directions: out through the sex organ or up into the higher energy centers.
Now, I do not mean to never have sex – what I mean is that you should not make sex a priority. Focus on yourself and have an abundance mindset and create a purpose.
The basis for sexual transformation is to take your sexual energy and channel it into a higher energy center. This higher energy center will bring you to higher vibrations and pull in positivity into your life.
Create a purpose – whether that be getting better pay and/or education in order to take care of your family. Starting a business or even creating a family. Use all this energy to create a purpose for yourself.
Furthermore, if you are a person that lacks willpower then there is a good chance that your sexual energy is leaking out via excessive sex, masturbation, stimulation, desire, worry, or overthinking. This will only bring you to low vibrations and make you have low vibrational energy.
For young men having an abundance mindset and transmuting your energy is of particular importance since they can channel their drive for sex and women into their professional work habits and can increase their willpower to realize their goals and achieve more.
Finally, put everything together to get a masculine frame:
A masculine frame can be described as many things. Having good social skills, learning to control your emotions and being on your purpose well encompasses what it means to be a man within frame. It also means you exude a masculine energy that both men and women can pick-up on.
If you have ever seen or known an alpha man then you know what I am talking about. They have an energy about them that can be described as light or even heat when they enter a room – they shine bright and heat up the environment. Things get interesting when they are around. They are in control of themselves to the point where actions and conversations flow and seem natural.
This is why it is important to stay in your masculine frame.